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Merry Christmas (late)
Happy new Year (early)

Not dead yet.

who said SSDD?

So you thought I was despairing?
Yeah, I was. Because Miss A was angry, seemingly at me and in reality at her bf.
So I'm less despaired.

And then I'm having my best day at work tomorrow:
Morning: tests on that airplane of our equipment from one of our suppliers to verify the good functioning of one feature I have responsibility for. "Unfortunately", I will be the one with the most extensive knowledge of the feature and will have to perform the tests (instead of the lab guy who won't be here). Major pride!!!
Early afternoon: tests (in the labs) of the equipment from our other supplier to evaluate the situation on their side. I am not responsible for these tests and will only attend as (I hate to love saying it) an "expert" of that same feature. As I've done the tests for the first supplier, my presence was requested to have a first assessment.
Late afternoon: Sheet metal workshop. I'm going to hammer away on my ladle.

So my despair has been replaced by a certain sense of exhilaration and anxiety.

No plans for the evening, yet.

One slight disadvantage of those eventful days: I probably won't see miss A all day. And if she happens to have tests on tuesday, it's going to be one hell of a long time. I'll have to send loads of SMS in the mean time!

SSDD

written on September 9th:
still alive
overwhelmed by contradicting emotions
not doing to well
but am ok

don't worry
As accurate now as it was then. Couldn't have said it better.

winning?

I've been playing squash for 2 or 3 months now, with colleagues, on average once a week. And whatever their level from total beginner to very confirmed, I've never won a single match, not even a single set.
I lost at least 4 matches I had the level to win.

Am I made to lose?

It's not an empty question with a quick "of course not, you're not made to lose, you just have to be a little bit better", and it's not a question asked in despair. It's all psychological and sociological.

I've lost one match with the intent not to win, but I can't say I would have won if I wanted to. I've lost matches because I'm plainly not good enough. And I've lost matches because I hate the pressure that comes with competition. I litteraly buckle under the lightest stress. And when my adversary takes the advantage by even 2 points, I'll just let the match go, lose 5 or 6 points straight, not even returning a service. Because after that, I'm not in a position to win anymore and I can enjoy myself once again with no objective.
But I hate losing too, especially to people worse than me or total beginners. I'm a sore loser.

There's one case where winning will be easy, if I'm playing against someone who's totally inept, and won't show any resistance. Not a match really.

I've seen that again this past thursday. Me along with 27 other people from my company went for a go-kart competition. 14 teams of 2 racers. The sport is interesting, the go-karts handle like go-karts are supposed to. Fast, but unforgiving. With no pressure, I'm acceptably slow; with pressure, I'm quite faster, until a late braking sends me in a spin. I hated the racing part of it, I'm slower than pretty much anyone, so not much competition or fun there. But the driving part of it is great! Go-karts tend to go sideways a lot, but "it's slow, so you shouldn't". Yeah right. It's fun! and that's the whole point of it! Winning or losing is for winners. I've paid almost 45 euros for 24 minutes of driving plus a meal. And I want to go sideways. Period.

Winning is telling someone else "I'm better than you", or even "Maybe you were better, but that changed". I'll have to have a very strong link with anyone to allow myself that freedom.

Or is this all just an excuse for losing with a heart?

I like boudin noir

and I consider myself tagged

How do you like your eggs?: with potatoes and cheese, in omelet

How do you take your coffee/tea: coffee, as prepared at work, black, no sugar. Or cappuccino if available. Tea, strong, black, no sugar, maybe with honey.

Favorite breakfast foods: No breakfast, but a massive bowl of milk with cereals is nice. Plus another helping of cereals. And a rhubarb jam tartine.

Peanut butter: the original, the dutch one. The Calve brand, and none of that american stuff. But not more than a tea spoon a month.

What kind of dressing on your salad?: It all depends on the salad, but balsamic vinegar and olive oil is a good start.

Coke or Pepsi?: Coke, Diet Lemon if possible.

You're feeling lazy. What do you make?: take-away

You're feeling really lazy. What kind of pizza do you order?: 4 cheese; tex-mex with jalapeno peppers; goat cheese and honey.

You feel like cooking. What do you make?: A salad, with what's in stock.

Do any foods bring back good memories?: Yup, Nems will always remind me of my regular visits to the Hopital pour Enfants Robert Debre. Not actually a good memory, but the meal afterwards meant I could forget it until the next visit, 6 months later.

Do any foods remind you of someone?: Rhubarb jam, noone does it like my father, noone. Creme Peruvienne, my father's mother. Scenery inspired birthday cakes, my other grandma... Lots

Is there a food you refuse to eat?: I don't consider it food, but there are meats I'm never going to eat. And then, oysters and snails. I don't intend to try insects either.

What was your favorite food as a child? Ask my mom, I wouldn't know.

Is there a food that you hated as a child but now love? not really. I don't enjoy cooked vegetables, but it's just not something I love much.

Is there a food that you loved as a child but now hate? Pumpkin soup, yuck.

Favorite fruit & vegetable: Fruit: watermellon. Vegetable: does salad count?

Favorite junk food: junk food in general. MacDonald's and Quick are safe bets on any given day.

Favorite between meal snack: cereal bars, cheese, ham, sweets

Do you have any weird food habits: Why cook when you can buy?

You're on a diet. What food(s) do you fill up on? Not applicable

How spicy do you order Indian/Thai? It's never that spicy in france anyway.

Can I get you a drink? Menthe a l'eau, orangina, coke, beer, water, white wine, milk, fruit juice...

Red wine or white? What's the main dish?

We only have beer: A bitter ale, a stout, an amber, a belgian white...

Favorite dessert? tarte tatin forever!!!!

"t'es un adulte, maintenant"

Following Apol's Le LTO post about her having received her driving licence, I've managed the feat of not scaring the daylight out of my inspector and thus, I have officially been stamped [approved for driving].
I need to return to the driving school on monday or tuesday to get the yellow paper that gives me the right to drive until my official driving licence is processed.
I have now been accepted as an "adulte" by my fellow coworkers.

And I'm in the process of finding both the insurance and the car, and of celebrating. Happened thursday night at my company's quarterly meeting, yesterday, at a street performers' gathering with a friend and one of her friend, and tonight, with yet other friends.
Damn, life is tough...

yup, I'm officially grown up!!!

Yesterday, I had officially worked for 3 months with my current employer.
Meaning, under the french legislation, that I am now a fully-fledged undismissable salaryman. Yay!!
So I decided to offer myself a worthy gift. Dream, think... A car, a computer, a bike, new clothes, another hat... Nope. A beer, a restaurant, a movie, a concert... Nope. A vaccuum cleaner.
And a movie.
I'll pay myself a restaurant this week end, maybe. If I can be accompanied. The machiavelic plan I've just fomented would be to invite cute coworker to a japanese I want to try, and keep the boyfriend at bay. Would be a nice replacement for the circus that sold out for this very saturday :D and which boyfriend didn't want to see. Hmm, sounds good!!!

Driving exam is postponed to sept, 21st, btw.

Nothing else to report, that I know of.

telegraphic styled

still alive
overwhelmed by contradicting emotions
not doing to well
but am ok

don't worry

tough times behind, tougher times ahead

So I screwed up... big time... at work... before the end of my 3-month trial.
If the client turns sadistic, heads may roll, and I'm the first in line.
Nothing dangerous happened, noone was put in any kind of danger, no priceless equipment was lost and no bunny was harmed in the making of that episode. We only spent a number of weeks doing out supplier's job, and I didn't realize they manipulated us until it was too late.
So a mail was sent to the higher-ups by "the lab" even though "the design office" (that means me and the team) should have reacted first. Expect finger-pointing to happen. The client will blame us, the lab will blame us, and they'll just say we should have kept the supplier's in check.
I hate being tricked, I hate being caught being tricked, and I'm going to read every frigging paper that defines even the smallest responsibilities and task allocation.

Plan of action:

• write down the reasons I didn't pull the alarm
• point fingers to other negligent people who should have noticed
• point out "that's the way it works with the supplier" mentality before I came in
  

• update resume

On a side note, why does everyone have to try to screw everyone?? Goddamnit, that drives me mad. That has to be the american way to success, talk nice, play dirty, abuse people. And I don't give a shit if it offends anybody.

Week end update

The musical circus event was great!!
If you have the chance, go watch Les Acrostiches, or Pulcinella, the jazz band I went to see 10 days ago. Both performances are really amazing.

Met two ex colleagues from my time at airbus last year. We've decided to meet again at a restaurant next week or the one after. I hope they bring in a couple of guys from the service, haven't seen the troops in a while.
I was thouroughly impressed by the talent and the imagination of Les Acrostiches. Le guest-star/musicien/4ieme acrostiche est d'une inventivite incroyable. Il a beaucoup joue en particulier d'un instrument qu'ils appellent le 'ang, qui s'ecrit le hang, qui sonne un peu comme un steeldrum, avec une esthetique et un son zen. Et quand on vous dira d'ou est originaire le hang, croyez-le, meme si ca a l'air d'une blague.
Il faut absolument que j'en trouve un album, et si je m'ecoutais, je m'en offrirais un, pour voir. Ca a l'air tout simple a jouer, mais tout a l'air tout simple a jouer quand ce sont des musiciens chevronnes qui en jouent.

Le match de squash de vendredi a ete difficile, j'ai perdu les 3 manches officielles puis les 2 officieuses avant la fin des 40 minutes. Tres peu de courbatures ce soir, mon corps s'habitue assez vite a l'effort violent que ca represente. Ca ne m'a pas empeche de passer l'apres match a souffrir d'un muscle refroidi trop vite dans le bas du dos par contre. Je suis alle voir le film Qui m'aime me suive, qui tres sincerement ne vaut rien. Histoire facile, previsible qui se tient sagement dans les limites de l'acceptable et evite toutes les difficultes, personnages fades, musique moyenne. Bref, decu.

Le week end se deroule plutot tranquillement, j'irai peut etre faire un tour au jardin des plantes demain, je ne l'ai pas encore visite. Sinon, j'irai faire un tour de rollos le long du canal du midi. J'ai toujours pas regle mes platines. A moins ke velo peut etre. On verra bien...

Lundi boulot, je ne fais pas le pont mais je passerai la soiree chez des amis. Mardi repos. Mercredi pas squash, je suis en essais toute l'apres midi et il y a des risques que je finisse trop tard pour etre sur le cours a temps. Donc un collegue jouera pour moi. I may go to the wednesday skating ride instead. And I'll take that decision when it's time to.

long week, bad concert, mucho sport

So last week was kinda long too, with some tough times at work. Damn box broke down with the latest patch, completely.
I went cheer for a colleague who happens to be a model plane pilot (good model plane pilot) with another colleague. We drove for a couple of hours in the Pyrenees, great roads, narrow tyres, screeching sounds from the four corners of the car, got busted by a century-old Renault 16 driven by an old dutchman (the car had the really really old blue plates from holland).
Monday was good, I went to see 2 colleagues play squash.
Tuesday was really long, we had a test session at 7:30AM, and a squash tournament at 7:40PM. Was driven back home at around 00:15.
Tonight, I tried to go to a concert, but it was sold out, went to the other one that seemed as good, but they had lied, it wasn't good. Left after 20 minutes, couldn't see the scene, and chamber music doesn't feel intimate when you share it with 500 people.
Tomorrow, I'll watch a circus/concert event that looks promising.
Friday, I'm playing squash again.
Am working monday, bank holidays tuesday, squash wednesday
Somewhere in the mean time, I'll need to fine tune my speed skates.

That's not the post I planned to write but then again, posts never turn out the way they're supposed to, just like kids.

What a week!!!

We're wednesday, I've blogged for the last time barely 4 days ago and I've lost track of time already.
In the 3 days of work I've done this week, I've spent over 30 hours in the office or in the lab. Can't actually remember what I did on monday. Tuesday, I was at the lab at 8, left at 3pm, cycled to the office and worked till 6:30 to prepare this morning's meeting. Today meeting at 9 which was prepared enough, so I got to work at 8 again, left at 6:30 again. Tomorrow, I'll be at the lab at 8 yet again and will leave early for driving lessons at 5pm, a colleague is supposed to take over at that time for the evening session until 10pm. Should have been me for the full day but I had already reserved the driving lessons. And no, I don't expect to eat, just like tuesday and just like the colleague today (yup he was at the lab from 8 to 3). Friday should be cooler: conducting a meeting at 9, but at work at 8 to print the agenda and writing the minutes to be sent before I leave in the evening.
Estimated hours: 48-49. Next week should be calmer. And I'm almost so relieved I'm not adding the 5 hours from tomorrow night.

With temps in the high 90's, cycling under the sun is an experience. Yesterday, while coming back, I felt as a snowman on a trip in Nevada, losing so much water I didn't know if there'd be enough of me at the end to call myself a human/snowman. (hmm, can anyone tell me what material is called "hu" and where I can find raw "hu"? I want to do a human by myself)
I'm taking all of this, the scorching heat, the insane hours, the pressure, as a challenge and an experience. It's actually thrilling to see if I can see the end of it or if I'll collapse before the end (I'll stop before I do that and request to have some work offloaded on someone else). So even though I may write as if I want it to be different, it's only to hide the fact that I'm enjoying myself.

I've also started enjoying leaving my flat more, I went to the movies again on sunday (I highly recommend Tsotsi by the way) and then went to the Prairie des Filtres to laze in the grass on the banks of the Garonne. And I went to a concert of gregorian chants by the Discantus choir, a group of 12 women. The concert was given in the Basilique de Saint Sernin, a magnificent building built at the same time and following the same blueprints as the basilica of Santiago de Compostela. More than just an exhibition of talents on a scene, the 12 women moved around the basilica, and the public to provide a different atmosphere, sometimes all together, sometimes in smaller groups. The lighting added to the atmosphere of serenity and concentration, in stark contrast with the lightning we could see through the windows and the thunder heard through the chants. Even the accoustic of the building was impressive, we could hear a single singer from the other side, and sounds played tricks reverberating on columns until I couldn't locate the singer anymore.
Truly a spiritual experience, and a fantastic one.
I will have to visit the basilica by day, and I think a friend would be interested too. And I am determined to see more concerts of ancient music, be it medieval or from the Renaissance or baroque. There are 2 or 3 concerts next week from the same festival where Mozart will be played by a chamber music orchestra. I plan to go. And Jordi Savall will play in January in Toulouse a few selected pieces from the most famous composers for viola da gamba. If you've seen Tous les matins du monde, Monsieur de Sainte Colombes and Marin Marais are two of the artists who Jordi Savall will play.

After this "back to my (classical) roots" moment, let me have a good night of sleep and attack tomorrow as yet another day of challenges and excitement.

Belle journee!!!

On est samedi, et la journee a ete superbe. La temperature a a peine depasse 30, un vrai bonheur compare au 35 qu'on a subi ces derniers jours. J'en aurais presque profite pour faire une grande ballade en bord de garonne ou du canal, mais je ne me sentais pas d'humeur a partir a l'aventure.Je me suis donc contente d'un film sans pretention a la seance de 18h. Sortant de la, j'ai quand meme enfourche mon velo pour me perdre dans les petites rues de 2 quartiers toulousains, toute la partie au sud de la rue de Metz entre la Garonne et le monument aux morts. Il y a vraiment des petits bijoux de tranquillite, et quelques lourds portails doivent cacher de bien jolies cours interieures. J'ai pu en appercevoir une, en gros paves et vieux batiments de brique.

Avec cette baisse de temperature, je pourrai peut etre meme fermer ma fenetre et mon store ce soir avant d'aller coucher. Ces derniers temps, meme au milieu de ma nuit, simplement allonge sur le drap, je reussissais a degouliner de sueur sur mon oreiller. Ouvrir la fenetre etait ma seule possibilite, et les passages de trains m'empechaient alors de dormir completement. Enfin bref, une bonne nuit de sommeil serait le bienvenu.

Surtout que la semaine a ete plutot rude, plusieurs matinees en salle d'essais qui se sont soldees par un echec de derniere minute, ma premiere reunion en tant qu'organisateur, beaucoup de taches de longue haleine qui deviennent un peu difficiles a gerer pour mon cerveau pas habitue, et 2 heures de conduite pas trop mal mais pas encore au niveau. J'en suis a 24h et je n'ai toujours pas attaque les manoeuvres. Visiblement, le boulot ne me laisse pas l'energie de conduire. Je ne suis meme pas sur de pouvoir passer mon permis en moins de 40 heures. Et je ne prends plus aucun plaisir a conduire.

Les 2 nouveaux au boulot sont en fait un nouveau et une nouvelle que tout le monde s'arrache. On nous a donne (a elle et a moi) la lourde responsabilite d'analyser des compte rendus d'essais, ce qui semblait deja difficile pour nos predecesseurs et carrement impossible pour nous, nouveaux. Donc on doit passer pas mal de temps ensemble pour croiser nos analyses. J'vous promet, j'y prend presque beaucoup de plaisir. Surtout qu'elle n'est pas une specialiste aeronautique, donc il y a pas mal de choses a lui apprendre. :-D Et pour me combler de joie, elle a choisi volontairement (promis, j'etais en essais ce matin la) le bureau en face du mien. Ca va pas toujours etre simple de se concentrer, j'vous jure.

La fatigue me gagne, j'passerai tetre faire un tour demain si j'ai d'autres trucs a dire.
En attendant, bonne fin de week end!!!

Soiree en bleu

Je l'savais, je l'savais!!! C'est une fille!!! Pas la mienne, non, j'ai pas encore d'enfants, a ma connaissance. Mais on sait depuis lundi que le bebe de flo et son mari sera une ptite fille. M'est avis qu'elle va rendre beaucoup de monde gaga. Ahem. Et moi ca m'fait grand plaisir.

Enfin bon. Ca fait 1 mois tout pile ke chuis au boulot, ca s'passe bien, les collegues sont top, le boulot est interessant, pas le temps de s'ennuyer, et d'ici peu on devrait avoir le materiel pour bosser dans les conditions ki vont bien. En plus j'ai deja croise 3 anciens collegues de mon departement de l'an dernier, donc j'ai pas l'impression d'etre completement dans un autre monde.
Et ce soir, sur mon pti velo en rentrant du boulot, j'ai croise la collegue ki etait arrive en cours de route dans mon precedent boulot. Tout sourire, lunettes de soleil et voiture de reve. Sur le coup, ca m'a rendu tout guilleret. Apres coup, c'est plutot la deprime. Si c'est pour meme pas pouvoir echanger 3 mots les rares fois ou on se croise (au moins 30 metres de bitume dans un rond point bond) vaut encore mieux ke je me trouve un chemin plus long pour eviter cet endroit. Mais tout le monde sait bien ke je continuerai a emprunter le meme itineraire dans l'espoir de la croiser de temps en temps.
Et j'ai fait une belle anerie en rentrant chez moi. J'ai d'abord appele les parents pour prevoir les repas du week end, ke je passe chez eux. Barbecue d'agneau vendredi soir, resto De Zwaan samedi, salades tous les midi. Ensuite, un peu de web, et un mail ecrit a une copine en allemagne. Et pour finir, 2 mangas de Mitsuru Adachi sur un fond de Supertramp. J'adore Adachi, mais ses histoires mi-figue mi-raisin, ca me fiche toujours le blues. Et Supertramp, ca aurait ete aussi simple de se faire tatouer sur le frond "SOIREE DEPRIME - DEMAIN FAUDRA PAS ME PARLER".

Me manque une biere tiede et du William Sheller pour vraiment finir au fond du trou.

Demain, je joue l'huitre, ou l'ours, j'ai pas encore choisi.

What, a month already?

And at the same time, it's only been a month?
Work's progressing fast, I'm understanding more and more almost every day, and the first official tasks have been given to me. Proof reading of external documents, follow up on test results, minutes of meeting writing...
And I'm better familiarised with the documentation, how it works and how it does not work.
The workforce has also increased, they were 1 1/2 working out supplier before I arrived, then I came in, then one guy came in last week and today the two last newbies arrived. We're officially good to go.
Except for the IT rights, but that was expected. I may be able to access my profesionnal email next week, and we may have the rights on certain software before august.
The few friends I've talked too tell me I sound cheerful and motivated, gotta believe I enjoy my job then :p
And the team's great, we're 9 working on the system, with 2 suppliers. There's one french black guy, there's one girl, and there's one guy just like me, breathing and living aviation. And a source of information, of course. The three other offices are also pretty lively and the 2 bosses are friendly enough.
I'm pretty sure I can enjoy that experience!!

On other sides, still biking to work, 45 minutes to and 45 from. Nice in the morning, less nice in the evening with temperatures above 30C. In case of emergency, the bus line I took to my previous job extends farther and closer to my new office. It requires a 15 minutes walk, but it's less tiring than cycling all the way.

And I'm flying to holland for the coming 3-day week-end. It's July 14th, national day in france and my plane will depart at 6:05 AM at the airport, close to which my job is. Useless but at least I won't get lost.

On this bright note, I'll hop in bed and pray I can sleep peacefully until tomorrow morning!! After all, the temperature dropped to only 29.x. I'd almost need something to keep warm.

Hmm...

Found that on Mik's post, as always...

Your Values Profile

Loyalty: You don't really value loyalty. In your opinion, friendship should be earned. If you don't agree with someone, it doesn't matter how close you are. You'll let them (and everyone else know) exactly what you think. Honesty: You don't really value honesty. You do value getting your way, no matter what. And if a little lying is required to do that, no problem. A few white lies never hurt anyone (at least, that's what you tell yourself!) Generosity: You value generosity a fair amount. You are all about giving, as long as there's some give and take. Supportive and kind, you don't mind helping out a friend in need. But you know when you've given too much. You have no problem saying "no"! Humility: You value humility a fair amount. You tend to be an easy going, humble person. But occasionally your ego takes over. You have a slight competitive streak - and the need to be the best. Tolerance: You value tolerance highly. Not only do you enjoy the company of those very different from you... You do all that you can to seek it out interesting and unique friends. You think there are many truths in life, and you're open to many of them.

The Five Factor Values Test

Hmm, it's quite unexpected. Loyalty is well described. I'll earn my friendship and so will you. And I'll tell if I disagree. But I'm not gonna break a friendship easily. That's probably tolerance.
You do value getting your way, no matter what. And if a little lying is required to do that, no problem. Nope, I don't value getting my way no matter what. I do value getting my way, and I may bend the truth a little. But it's something I don't like to do.

Next post in a coupla days. I'm beat, dead tired, and I'm losing the will to keep my eyes open. So I'm off to bed. Now, at 9pm.
Great job, just exhausting and with the goddamn steepest learning curve I've ever witnessed.

The grass is greener...

So am starting tomorrow morning, and I hate every second that brings me closer to that 9am deadline.

To tell the truth, my prime motivation to find a job was that unemployement doesn't pay much. And I need much to live. So economically, I had only 2 simple solutions:

• find a job
• find a rich woman to marry

Feasibly, solution 1 was the only viable.

I've been evading settling down for a long time, waiting for a job offer rather than looking for one actively, and staying away from long-term contracts. My last 3 pro experiences were failures. My student exchange in the UK was one of the worse experiences in my life, and it lasted 6 months; my internship writing Quality Management documents is hardly what I wanted to do, and my first interim mission in Toulouse showed me some the bad sides of having a job: stupid boss, proactively inefficient team members, and utterly boring tasks. It felt like being in a rudderless sail boat with no sails on a glass-smooth sea. You're not going anywhere, and the only thing that changes is the size of your ever diminishing supplies.

I'm going to have a hard time readjusting to the realities of the workplace. Don't want to wake up, don't want to dress up, don't want to answer to anyone's authority and plainly don't want to spend my days behind a desk that's not actually mine.
I'd hope that the novelty wears off fast, and that I can fall back to a semi-boredom state where small surprises keep you entertained but don't push you to your limits. And I hope I will never be expected to stay late, let me do my regular 40 hours a week without complaining. Or I'll go work at the chain where the 35 hours specified on my contract actually mean something.

Hmm, I actually heard german companies compensate you for overtime through additional days off or bonuses. I'll have to think about it...

Oh YEAAAAAAAAAAH!!!

I looked for another title, but I can't find any that fits better cuz

I HAVE FOUND A JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I signed this afternoon, after two unnerving weeks.

Since monday afternoon, I was set to sign on monday morning at firm B to work "in situ" at firm A. Acceptable job, with major pros and major cons, but lousy contract. At least, I had a job.

Tuesday Guy 3 of firm C calls me to set an appointment (already had seen Guy 1 and 2, guy 1 I hated, Guy 2 I loved). We decide on wednesday, even though I'm only going to discuss the long term possibility (I hadn't told him).

Wednesday comes, the interview starts fine, and when the time sounds right (before we start talking business) I inform him that I've accepted with firm A and that I'm only here for long term investigation. Not bothered, he explains his needs: 3 places for which he has another 10 candidates. At that point, I no longer care because I can't afford to take risks and competition seems stiff. After he has explained that and his vision and his work methods, I'm thoroughly depressed, it's too good to be true yet the risk to lose everything like last time is too high.
Comes the end of the interview, and he asks what I think of it all. Which is something like:
That job would rock, it's the first consulting firm that has transmitted something which is not just marketing, and I just love the way you seem to manage the team and your professional life, but sorry mate, you're too late. I'm signing on monday with the other ones.
I don't know what clicked, but he told me he'd get a contract by friday, I just had to call Guy 2 the next morning and confirm I was ready for the ride.

Thursday, I call Guy 2, confirm I'm set but that if I don't have anything by friday night, I'm signing with firm A. Not 3 minutes later, one of the 2 co-CEOs calls me "I've got Guy 2 in my office, he's telling me to call you and set an appointment tomorrow". Geez, they're fast. Right, I'd love to meet you, what time's right?

Today, he starts the interview by "Our goal is first, to present ourselves and discuss the job in general terms, and finally sign the contract". That sounds like a plan, right? 1 hour later, I've officially signed the contract and I'm on my way back to the inner city.
The last thing to do was to call firm A and inform them of my newly found position. Didn't go that well, but hey, what d'you expect when you tell them off on a friday at 5 pm when I'm supposed to sign monday at 9am and start working one hour later, which is already weeks later than the customer expected.

I've got apprehensions, I'm not so sure how that mission will turn out, and I don't even know yet what my exact task will be.
But I have no regrets and it's written white on black right here that at this point, I firmly believe I have chosen the path that will be the most interesting.

And good week end to you too, I'm off celebrating!!!!!

Just to show...

que je peux encore parler francais (avec les fotes quand meme)!

J'ai deux entretiens cette semaine, l'un avait lieu lundi, l'autre a lieu demain. A chaque fois, la necessite de prendre le velo pour aller sur place, 10 kilometres sous un soleil magnifique et sans un nuage. Temperature de printemps (29 au plus aujourd'hui), pas de vent, et la Garonne commence a descendre, on en voit le fond le long de la piste cyclable. Les immeubles en bord de Garonne doivent etre tres agreables en ce moment. Et j'adore voir les gens profiter de leur jardin, surtout quand ca implique de l'huile solaire et un bikini string rouge. (@ _ @)
On ne va pas se formaliser, elle etait a plat ventre sur sa serviette.


Sinon, les lecons de conduite sont devenues tres interessantes, malgre 2/3 frayeurs aujourd'hui. L'anecdote nous a fait nous ecrouler de rire, le moniteur et moi:
au volant de notre bonne vieille Modus, on attaque une petite route sympa et, comme d'habitude, j'accelere un peu legerement au gout de mon moniteur (l'a pas froid aux yeux, et on est un peu dans le meme etat d'esprit). Donc il ecrase l'accelerateur, je garde le pied legerement dessus pour sentir quand il arrete et trouve qu'il ne s'arrete pas, (ca doit etre un test pour me faire retrograder et passer les virages un peu vite, je me dit). Toujours en 4ieme, j'ai arrete de regarder le compteur et me concentre sur le virage ki suit quand il me signale que 105km/h, "ca fait beaucoup, quand meme".
Lacher de l'accelerateur,
freinage, retrogradage en 3
freinage, retrogradage en 2
Arret, passage point mort, frein a main.
Il semblerait que j'ai (moi, pas lui) garde le pied sur l'accelerateur beaucoup trop longtemps, sans m'en rendre compte, apres qu'il l'ait relache. "ah bon, tu l'as relache? j'ai rien senti". S'en suit 3 minutes de fou rire, 2 minutes pour se calmer, et un redemarrage un peu incredule.

Y ajouter un demarrage loupe avant un rond point et un refus de priorite eliminatoire (la voiture en face allait pas vite, etait loin, j'aurais pas tente si j'avais ete a l'arret et ca passait largement, mais ca aurait ete eliminatoire quand meme) et la session s'est fini avec 3 questions pas compliquees pour valider le Module 1. Je suis donc officiellement capable de conduire ma voiture convenablement. Il me reste juste a prendre conscience de mon environnement exterieur et a m'y positionner (ahem priorites a droite, ahem choix de file sur la rocade...).


Sur ce, je vais aller profiter des derniers rayons du soleil pour enfourcher ma bicyclette et aller voir le Da Vinci Code. Comme ca, je pourrai le critiquer en toute bonne conscience.

Not that it will matter, but...

UBUNTU 6.06 DAPPER DRAKE IS OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's time to close the curtains, switch the lights on, order pizza and beer and lock myself in. Return to geek mode, in short.


So, that Ubuntu thingy is the flavour of linux that did turn me into a die-hard linux fan. I've only kept Windows so far for a few reasons:

• Can't read MKV files on linux in fullscreen and many animes are encoded in mkv. That's because of my graphic card. I hope to solve the graphic card driver issue with Dapper so...
• Can't print in Linux. Driver problem with my printer and CUPS. Ought to be solved with a bit of mouse and command-line work.
• My resume doesn't show up like it should in OpenOffice on Linux. It does however on OO on Windows, so it's probably a font I haven't installed.
• I haven't tested the iPod compatible software on Linux just yet. So I'm still running iTunes on Windows just in case.
• I only have Matlab for Windows, not for linux.

I'll use this clean reinstallation of linux to hopefully solve problems 1 to 4.

Major geek fun time ahead :D.

On a side note, does anyone know of a good software to organise notes? I'm collecting recipes every few days to solve a problem or another on my computer and I'd like to centralise those data into a structured thingy somewhere.

bits of news

I've just noticed (right...) that I hadn't updated in many days. So, what's been happening in those numerous days?

• I spent last week end in Hamburg, Germany to celebrate the birthday of a friend

Hadn't seen her in 2 years. She was my boss at the drama club in engineering school and a passionate member of my rocket builders team the year before. One year younger than me and a resume that's way more impressive than mine (ok, it's not that hard, but yet...). She's living in the second wealthiest neighbourhood of Hamburg, and it shows. The area is magnificent, the kindergarten is so amazing it has to be protected by UNESCO and the only two cars I've seen that cost less than 45 000 euros are a collector 2CV and a Clio owned by some french expat. The whole city reminded me of Holland, the same basic architecture, the same atmosphere, the same wealth... The harbour is also a nice place to spend time visiting, especially on a saturday at 7 in the morning. It had been wiped out by bombings during the WWII and the architects have been creative in rebuilding it. The post-industrial style, in conjunction with the overlooking train lines on a metallic bridge, it would make an incredible decor for an anticipation movie.
The birthday itself was great too, a funny mix of people (french, german, spanish, chinese) who speak all of these languages plus english in various combinations. A big conversation carried out in french, german anf english concurrently.
I left monday morning, but I'll return there to visit the place more extensively once my situation has evolved.

• Went to the movies a couple of times:
• Soylent Green, so much creepier now that we're closer from it. Though Charlton Heston's style and acting left me cold.
• Ice Age 2, not as good as I hoped, but that squirrel is just sooo stubborn. A good laugh nonetheless.
• Hoodwinked, Useless, boring, and technically unimpressive. The squirrel was good but not worth the effort. Do you see a trend?
• Monsters, Inc. , maybe my favourite CG movie ever. I bought the DVD discounted at Fnac. Boo is so incredibly cute ( and yet again the cutest thing in the whole movie, yes it's a trend).

• Along with Monsters, Inc. , I bought to other DVDs for close to peanuts:
• Sleepy Hollow, the start of My Depp-Burton-Elfman collection. With Christina Ricci too, a favourite of mine. I may watch it tonight, depending on my endurance.
• L'ours. I am actually not sure I will ever watch the DVD. But it's the kind that you just have to have, no matter what. Will I ever summon the courage to see it again? The first time I saw it at the movies, I cried my eyeballs out, it was 1989, I was 8. It's 2006, I'm 25, but I'll certainly cry my eyeballs out again if I try.

• I've started "the book you shouldn't read", Eragon. It seemed ok went I read the summary in the bookshop. I've read more than 150 pages and it still seems ok, but people confused me when I talked about it. Is it that famous? It's easy to read, entertaining, and it hasn't been written by Tolkien so I don't really see the problem.

• Driving lessons are progressing well. I stalled once yesterday, I reached third gear a number of times, and I didn't kill anyone. More importantly, changing gears is becoming easier, and I finally have some feedback in the pedals, I do feel when I accelerate, maintain my speed, slow down and how hard I break. The lack of feedback may be because I still don't drive hard enough. That'll come, but it's exhilirating to actually drive a car mostly on your own. Navigating and maneuvering will be the next big objectives. I've driven 6 hours.

• I had an interview today with yet another subcontractor. Probably not as interesting as the two previous offers I had but lost, but still in the tests departments. It went well, the interviewer gave me clues that my speech is hitting where I want it to and that I can spin my quirks in a positive light. Answer from their side in 2 weeks.

I'm going to Paris for the Ascension to visit all the people I haven't seen in the longest time (ca va quand meme faire plus de 8 mois depuis le 18 septembre) and to finally visit Eurodisney.

That's it for today, I'm dead tired, so I'll leave Sleepy Hollow for tomorrow...

Inspiration!!

I was reading about a couple of guys who built a lego robot to play Super Mario Bros (lame design, by the way, punching buttons on a preprogrammed timing is just lame, use a camera and digital analysis next time).
side note: hey, trying to teach a computer to play Super Mario Bros may be way cool, or just to start, play Tetris cuz it's simpler. I'll need to try something when I get around buying a webcam.
Well, anyway, so plenty of people bash those two for their design and not using a cam (just like I did) until one comment hits the nerve:

[quote]
21. One could make a lego robot that manipulates the controls of.. another lego robot.. I'm not going any further.
[/quote]

Doesn't that feel powerful? I can already picture a lego construction with a chain of little robots, each controlling the next one until the last controls the first one. An infinite loop made of legos :p

Well, to tell the truth, I've been eyeing the Lego Mindstorms NXT, hitting the shelves in August and going for the bargain price of "around 250 to 300 euros". Can anyone lend me a shoulder, I need to cry... and find a job, so I can have money and buy half a dozen sets, in addition to a car, a computer and an iPod.
The worst is that the specifications of the "brain-brick" is open-source, the magic word :-D Yup, am having shivers from anticipation.

Remember Lacuna Coil?

Talked about them in that post.

They're regulars when party-crashers invite themselves in my life. Which feels a bit like they just did. Until now, I was running pedal to the metal, knowing full well that I could get any job I set my eyes on. Dream on, mate. You're no better than anyone else. Failure is also part of your life. And suddenly, life feels a lot lonelier.

On the positive side, my dad's surgery went well this morning and he's recovering at home. Underneath that positive feeling, there's the nagging sentiment that my parents are aging, it was tough hearing his diminished voice on the phone. Parents aren't invincible, I haven't accepted it yet.

I want to drink my troubles away.

I miss the evenings we'd spend where I lived as a student, a cheap meal, a couple of beers and Pink Floyd on the stereo, talking about important things, planes, cars & girls. I felt part of a group. That group has dissolved, and the groups I've joined since then aren't as consistent, too many differences between individuals. One exception of course, the blogosphere, but we're still a long way from lying on the carpet, listening to Matmatah or Dire Straits and sharing memories of days spent at the airfield.

Shit, I miss people...

ouch

"Someone else has been selected for this position".
Ouch, I didn't want to hear that. Another department was interested by my resume, but I screwed the interview.
With some chance, other departments will also be interested. And I haven't heard back from Eurocopter, which isn't bad news but isn't good news either.
...

goofing around

Posted under Linux...
Yup, I've made it, I've turned into an ubergeek, and nothing can make me come back.This screenshot from my computer is:

• Internet Explorer 6, running on Linux.

I need to install Windows Media Player now, but am not in a hurry.

I've done some progress on the robot simulator on linux, but I haven't touched my little rectangles on Matlab since the video in the previous post.

Movies-wise, I've seen V for Vendetta and Ice Age 2. I didn't like V at all, it's useless and barely entertaining.
On the contrary, I've appreciated Ice Age. It doesn't intend to be politically charged, even though talking about global warming is certainly not a coincidence. I thought most characters were either thin or too silly/stupid to be really funny, but that squirrel and its nut, man, that was gooood. It really added something else.

And on the driving side, I've had my 2 first hours of theory today, learning how a car works (duh), and what are the buttons around the wheel and the stuff under the hood/bonnet.
Tomorrow are the 2 next hours, where I'm supposed to learn trajectories and the driving wheel handling. That part will require time, I can feel it...
Then there's going to be 2 more hours to learn pedal work and gear changing. And finally, I'll get to kill pedestrians and cyclists, mwahahahahahah :-D

Quelles sont vos pretentions salariales?

Thursday over, I've already had 3 interviews this week and I'm having the fourth tomorrow.

The one on tuesday (Eurocopter, Marignane) went wayyyyyy to well for me. The job would be awesome (core calculations on all main rotors of the Eurocopter helicopters, with expertise in performance, mechanical loads and acoustics), I'd be trained for 300 hours in the first year, and well, I'd be working on the main element of helicopters.
The whole trip wasn't quite as interesting, the inner marseille, between the Gare St Charles, the Cannebiere and the port is the last place I want to visit again. Filthy, overcrowded, and a place you don't feel comfortable walking through in suit and tie. You kinda feel like an alien, and a few times like a source of easy income. Blah. Overall, I spent almost 150 euros for this trip, but it may be worth it. And, Kala, next time, I'll organise myself a bit better so we can meet up somewhere!!

Wednesday was a tough one. I was awoken by my cellphone at 10:30 am, scheduled an interview at 14:00, and got ready as fast as I could. The interview didn't go too well, but the job wasn't in my field anyway.

And today was the worst interview I've had since I've started looking in January. I should have visited the company before, but after mucho problems cancelled a previous interview. So I went back and met one of the department bosses. He started by presenting the company, which operates outside of my usual scope and is known for a financial scandal from a few years back. That guy probably missed his opportunity as a TV news anchor, that same detachment of every word, slow pronunciation and exagerated tone, plus the gaze. Blank. Text learnt by heart, no possibility to interact.
Then I presented myself, got interrupted a few times, attacked on the fact that I wasn't a pilot. "Students can have good discounts and you should have done it". Yeah, well, I spent close to 90 000 euros of my parents money to get an education, so cut the crap. Plus, I don't really feel the need for piloting.
When he got in the end that I wasn't the person he saw through my resume, I got the blame for choosing the internships and jobs I got. I was sure he was the one who called me for an interview, not the opposite.

Then came the Question. Quelles sont vos pretentions salariales?
The quick answer is 28-30 kE, market value, negotiable.
The long answer is it's not up to me anyway, I'm a junior engineer, your firm has grids to decide how much you can pay me, and there's nothing I can do about it. So don't ask like you care.
As far as I was concerned, I didn't much care what he thought anymore. And yes, I know all firms ask that or "Quelles sont vos exigences salariales?", and I reply pretty much the same thing every time, "28-30, negotiable, and your grids will tell you how much you can pay me".

We finally reached part 3 of the interview, and the discussion went approximately like this:

Him: What do you expect from this interview?
Me: Get to know your firm in more detail, which I did in part 1 of the interview and discuss possible missions you may have that would suit my profile.
Him: Let me rephrase, my goal in this interview is to start a contact with you and see if we could extend our collaboration through a second interview with a service manager and then through a third interview where we would finally propose you a mission.

Please, sir, can I go? You don't give a damn what I think, we're not discussing, you're interrogating me instead, and you have nothing interesting for me... The rest of the interview kept at the same aggressive and unconstructive level.
When he finally released me from this inferno, I removed the business suit, exchanged the glasses for sunglasses, rolled my sleeves and cycled back like I was on holidays :-)

I'm a blunt guy, I'm not a diplomat, I'm here to do a job, and I'll only make ronds de jambe up to a point. Gimme me a mission and I'll tell you if I can do it or not, invite me to talk and face my indifference.

Manny's portraits

I wanted to write a lyrical post, but... here's the picture anyway:
A portrait

I just love the work by this photographer: Manny's page

Interview, marseille, linux, robots

Hey all :-)

I've got my schedule for monday-tuesday.
I'll be arriving slightly before 5pm in Marseille on monday.
Anyone knows a nice and acceptably cheap resto over there? I wanted to arrive later, but that was the only train with available seats.
If I don't forget to reserve a room, the hotel is situated less thana kilometer away from the airport. My interview is at 10 am, running till noon (I'll see HR and the technical guy one after the other).
So at noon, they'll free me. I may try to visit the factories in the afternoon but I'm not sure I'll manage.
My train back to Toulouse is at 19:30, so I'll probably spend the day in Marseille. Again, does anyone know what I could do for the afternoon?

I have reinstalled linux on my machine last week, so I can tinker with it a bit more and hopefully, I can get a few interesting pieces of software to work. I've chosen the Ubuntu flavour that "everyone" talks about. It's definitely easier to use than the Fedora Core 3 I tested last year. But it's still nowhere near ready for the casual Windows user.
Even though there's not much software to install compared to Windows(most is preinstalled), installing additional stuff is still a pain. Point-and-click beats command line anyday. When you can point-and-click... I've been trying to compile and run a robot simulator for 3 days now, and that's not fun at all...

Until I found a Pyro/Knoppix Live-CD that I'll try as soon as it's burned. Of course, to burn it, you'll need a CD-R drive (check), an empty CD-R (check) and the software to do it, which is where the problem is: "I can't find the damn software and I can't find where to get it". Until I fall back on the Ubuntu documentation: Right click on the .iso and select Write to Disc... (about 3/4 of the way down the menu) and follow the instructions.
Duh, who would have thought it'd be already there... I'm still a windows user, and a Tux noob, alright.

I'll tell you more when I've tested this LiveCD. Until now check Gazebo. The videos at the end are awesome.

choose your own title

Job hunting is coming along, I've got my third interview for the black box analysis sometime this week or the next one. It will be scheduled by my employer and the customer and told to me afterwards. This interview should be fairly routine and there's little risk they'd refuse me.
I was also contacted for a first interview by Eurocopter Marignane. I had replied to a job offer to work on the main rotor design but the offer had disappeared from the net after a few days and I thought they had found someone. Turns out they haven't yet or a new position was opened. I'll meet them next tuesday from 10 AM to noon. No train that early in the morning means I'll take one the day before and sleep at a cheap hotel in the area. The job could be brilliant too, I'm so fascinated by helicopters :-D But I'm not sure I wanna move anywhere at the moment.

Been going back to the movies in the last 2 weeks:
+La Planete Blanche, on the wilderness around the North Pole, with very impressive pictures
+Truman Capote, I didn't know the guy and I should have remained ignorant. jerk
+Romanzo Criminale, the story of a group of friends in Italy in the 70's who turned into a fearless criminal organisation. Not as interesting as I thought it would be.
+Renaissance, black and white animation movie set in Paris in 2020 or 2050. Long, boring, not much of a story, and a mechanical feel in the animation that doesn't help. Lip synch doesn't help. Only saved (barely) by the fact that I know someone who worked on it :p she even has her name in the credits :D

I've spent the week end in Paris, arriving there on friday night, and coming back on sunday night. On my way to my friends' flat, I met them going in the opposite direction. So we went to the movies, missed the start time and spent the evening in an irish pub. I had my first pint of cider in a loooong time, then my second.
The next day I spent in the city, going to the Fnac to look for books. I bought 2 Clive Cussler and I found Porco Rosso, in 2 DVDs :D :D :D :D. My all time favourite animation movie, dubbed in french because Jean Reno is just awesome. The history of an italian pilot who turned into a pig between WW1 and WW2 flying in his red Marchetti seaplane. It's all nostalgic and sad and full of hope in the same time.
Saturday night was the birthday party of the friends who invited me. Great evening, twice more food than what was needed as usual, and people I hadn't seen in a long time. Great moment altogether.
And we spent sunday doing nothing until I fled to catch my return train.

That's about it, I almost finished the first Cussler in the train and am back waiting for job news...

new vid

Programmed in less than 1 hour 2 days ago.

The principle:
If the robot sees more light red than dark red, it turns left;
If the robot sees more dark red than light red, it turns right;
The bigger the difference in pixel number of each colour, the slower it goes.

Here it is

It's now coded in WMV, and it probably will remain like that, until someone can show me a point and click software to encode raw AVI files into either AVI or MPG files readable by WMP (and if possible iTunes/QT at the same time).

video problems

I've made 1 new version of the vid from yesterday. Tell me if it works or not.
If it doesn't, I'll do some research on the internet on how to encode them for WMP, cuz matlab won't do it.

Video1 Cinepak

Other news:
Passed my code, rode 20 kilometers, waited for ages, spent 25 minutes in a dark room, and pedaled back 15 kilometers. But the result is: I don't need to worry about it anymore. It's been easier than I thought, except for 2 odd questions.

Tomorrow=day of THE job interview, so I'm off to do some reading on black boxes and then am off to bed. So tired...

Tadaaa!!!! Version2

Actually, I rushed it out yesterday night.
Although the picture was real, it was only the result of a proof-of-concept. So I went back to it right after I posted and kept coding until I arrived to something that looks better. That happened around 6:30 AM this morning. At that point, most of the basics was done. There was some more work to do to present it to the wide world (anyone who doesn't have matlab, that is).

What I managed is to animate that scripted picture. Here's the animation (it's a video, you'll have to download it but it's very light): Video1 . Save it to your computer and drop a comment if you can't see it (WMP doesn't work anymore on my PC so I couldn't try it, VLC doesn't work but MediaPlayerClassic worked fine).

It's actually a simplistic simulation of a robot (that's the black rectangle). The code is right here: (yup the code is the picture). It takes the inputs of the movement (the speed and the turn of the "driving wheel"), it makes a little math to find the path the robot takes and then it makes some more computation to display it on my screen.
Then there's a script that takes the display from my screen and transforms it into a nice movie that I can upload to the net and brag about for years to come.


That took me about 3 weeks to go through, most of the hard work being done on the display and the movie making. In the time it took me to do it I learnt a lot about torture devices called Graphical Elements Handles and Level 2 M-file S-Functions which is the most powerful and least documented feature of matlab, of course. But now, I can say I know.

That was the tedious and painful work. Now comes the creative part of it. I've designed the simulation so that the robot can sense its environment. It can see the colour of the world under it and somewhat around it. And it's pretty easy (I hope) to design a "brain" with commands such as:
- if you see yellow in front of you, turn left and slow down
- if you see red on your side, stop, reverse and turn in the opposite direction
- ...

That brain is the real reason of my robot simulation. I will be able to tinker with it very easily and test things out. One of the first things I'll try is the line-following robot. It's a simple robot that follows a line marked on the floor. Then I'll try to model more complex behaviours, light-hungry robots, explorers, robots that have a memory of their world... What I'd like to obtain in the end is a robot that could mimic curiosity.
Another very interesting area of research is the behaviour of swarms of robots. But that will come at a later date. And yes, of course, I'll probably buy a real robot with a little processor and sensors to let loose in my room. A robot with tracks, like caterpillars or a robot with 6 legs like an insect? Tough choice...

Tadaaa!!!! (very proud of myself)

Took me weeks to obtain that picture!!!
And I'll need a few more nights of work to make it worth anything.

Yes, you can try finding what it is, and
No, I'm not mad yet, or at least not more than the average in the family.

Breeding something else than figures

Remember how I talked about those figures I've managed to breed on my computer?

I've probably found the ultimate evolutionary computing example.
Check this out

With luck, you may soon be able to buy a mythological pet

Yup, this guy breeds mythological animals on a computer and then will try to transform their simulated genome into an-in-the-flesh genome, and an in-the-flesh animal.
I'll sign for a personal example of Buckbeak, of course.

Mind you, this would be the open door to the "other" side of genetic manipulation, I'm sure G.I. George will invoke the divine (although they're more pagan than christian) nature of these animals to raise hords of unicorns to pierce through the hearts of those terrorists and socialists and atheists (who both will turn into terrorists anyway).

-----------------------------------------------------------
Update:
got tricked. Please people, post your April Fool's jokes on the 1st of April, NOT the day before...

Emergency situation - penultimate update

I hated the thought that it might happen, and it happened.
Firm 1 invited me for a second interview that happened yesterday. The results were overall very positive, with a good contact with who would be my future boss and the agency's manager. The job would be interesting, and well, it could be a great job altogether.
They told me they'd discuss it internally and I informed them they had competition from the neighbours. So they didn't waste anymore time and called me with a proposition, with a salary, non-negotiable, and a start date, monday in 10 days. Against their will, I told them I'd hold my decision for 24 hours, to cool down and think it over. The call went off, and I immediately called Firm 2.
Firm 2 called me two days after my first interview with Firm 1 last week. Their departments are more interesting, but I felt like I wasn't the only candidate (two other guys were in the waiting room for interviews when I was there). So I called my contact at this firm, and left a message on his cellphone saying something along the lines of "Firm 1 is offering me a contract, I'd like to know if you want to make a counter proposition". And then I waited.
At 3pm, I had to leave for the code lessons, and forgot to bring my phone. When I came back, after offices closed, there was a message "A position was opened in the Department that deals with this and that, we'd like to discuss it with you".
At that moment, I thought they should have called faster and decided to go with Firm 1. But I didn't call. Now, it's 1:06AM, I'm supposed to be in bed and fast asleep, but I can't.

See:
I've got on one side a firm offer with a salary in 10 days for a position that could be very interesting. On the other side, I've got a half proposition, that could turn sour at any time, but for a position that's a hundred times more interesting (only short of riding the planes themselves actually).
I have said I'd give my decision (that would be positive, I even said) to Firm 1 tomorrow at noon. So in the 3 hours between the offices opening and noon, I'll have to call Firm 2, ask if we could arrange a meeting withing 2 to 3 hours, evaluate the probablility that the position is offered to me and noone else, call Firm 1 and say Yes or No.

Worst case scenario: If I say no to Firm 1 and in the end Firm 2 says no to me, I'll be the biggest ass in the universe.
Bad case scenario: I say yes to Firm 1 and somehow learn Firm 2 was going to offer it to me.
Best case scenario: I say no to Firm 1 and take the offer at Firm 2.

What should I do? Play safe and go for F1, or gamble and try for F2?
I've got approx 8 hours to decide.

Oh, and btw, a firm in Aix en Provence requested an interview to work at Eurocopter in Marignane. The icing on the cake in terms of potential missed opportunities, though I will turn them down, uncertainty factor being close to infinite.

Mon ptit monde

Un peu de musique calme (Enya-Amarantine bien sur), un grand verre de sirop pamplemousse-litchi, mon ordinateur portable, et le sentiment d'etre la et maintenant.
C'est ainsi qu'arrive l'ile de la serenite, au milieu des remous de mon existence. Il est vrai que la recherche d'emploi est une tache interessante et meme fortement motivante quand elle se deroule bien, ce qui est le cas en ce moment. Depuis mon retour sur Monster.fr, il n'y a eu qu'un jour ou je n'ai pas recu un coup de fil pour me demander si j'etais interesse par un entretien, ou par une agence de recrutement pour savoir si il pouvaient transferer mon CV a un de leurs clients. En plus, les postes ki me sont proposes sont en majorite interessants, meme si l'on m'a fait au moins 2 propositions dans le management et le relationnel client.
J'ai pour l'instant 2 tres grosses opportunites concretes que je souhaite poursuivre et une piste dont j'ai ete l'initiateur. J'ai en effet repondu a une offre d'emploi en contrat de qualification chez Eurocopter, sur un poste en etudes rotor. Bon, l'offre a disparu du site EADS, j'ai peur qu'il ait ete pourvu.

Les 2 propositions que l'on m'a faites et sur lesquelles je vais me concentrer sont tres similaires. Elles emanent de 2 entreprises de conseil en ingenierie qui travaillent en particulier pour airbus. Les deux offres seraient pour des postes aux Essais, postes non specifies a l'heure actuelle, dans le sens ou je suis interesse par l'ensemble de leurs activites aux Essais. Ca pourrait etre (entre autre) dans:
L'avionique et les systemes embarques
Le depouillement de boites noires
La communication Avion-Sol, Avion-Compagnie voire Avion-Avion
Les Qualites de Vol
La structure
L'interface homme-machine en cockpit

Selon le service, je pourrais etre amene a travailler aussi bien a la preparation des essais, qu'a leur conduite et a leur depouillement. Et ca pourrait impliquer du travail sur simulateurs fixes, sur simulateurs de vol, voire sur avion, et des discussions avec les Bureaux d'Etudes, les fournisseurs, les integrateurs, et meme les pilotes d'essais (parler avec Ms Rosay, Lelaie ou Alonso, du bonheur au kilo).

Ah, oui, un autre detail marrant, les 2 entreprises sont donc concurrentes, et voisines. A tel point que les 2 entretiens techniques ont eu lieu dans le meme batiment, qu'ils partagent, a 2 etages d'ecart. Et la deuxieme entreprise est tres interessee par le fait que j'ai ete contacte par la premiere et tient a ce que je les previenne si la premiere me ferait une proposition. Vous sentez pas comme une opportunite de pouvoir grappiller quelques avantages?
Et en tout cas pour la premiere entreprise, ils recherchent quelqu'un volontaire pour une mission de longue duree (plusieurs annees) voire pour y faire carriere. Donc pas de demenagement intempestif dans 6 mois pour aller bosser dans un bled perdu (genre Chateaudun ou Sochaux, pour ceux qui connaissent)

Bon ben pour la serenite, faudra repasser, il est 1h du mat, presque, et j'ai commen une envie d'aller pieuter.

Tchoooo la gang

Emergency situation - update 3

The emergency has changed somewhat.
I'm less afraid of losing the unemployment indemnities, cuz they're way lower than I thought, I'll barely be able to pay my rent and a few bills, but not pay for anything else like food or public transports. So in the end, the situation is even more critical than I thought.
On the bright side, I'm having at least one phone call each day to ask either if I'm ok with them sending my cv to a potential employer/client or if I'm interested by a specific job.
I had to turn down a few of these already, in management essentially. Although one was a 3-week mission in the region Centre (equivalent to middle-of-nowhere) to rush a proposal for a Call for Tender. Could have been great except I couldn't reach the place without a car. Damn.

I've got 1 running offer, and 2 interviews coming.
I actually got a phone call a 10:40 this morning to see if I was interested and if I could meet with them this afternoon at 13:30. Meeting with the Technical Director as they're called and right away with Human Resources. It definitely feels emergency-like on their side. Obviously means work will start very rapidly (can anyone say monday?) and it's gonna be intense. I work boest under pressure, that's good!!!
I just hope it's a short mission, if it's going to be that intense from the start. It would also allow me to keep in touch with the running offer, which is the Holy Grail of the aviation engineer, in the Testing department, with the flight test pilots and the aircrafts and the simulators!!! Well I've got a number of interrogations that they will need to fill. The very short description of the job seemed interesting, also in testing but I don't know more.
Will keep you updated!!!

Obviously, this might make a dent in my code learning.
Oh, btw, I did my "evaluation", which consists in taking the driver seat in a real car in a real city and drive through town to see how good I am, without any help from the instructor. Scary experience.
Verdict: ca. 32 hours will be needed before I can take the driving exam. Though luck

15 years ago

Me listening to the album V (five, not vee, I'm told) from Symphony X with one of my 4 headphone sets.
I've got my iPod earbuds, pretty dead with a slight electronic noise in the right earbud. I've got my massive closed Sony headphones, nice but aging and with less bass than I'd like. I've got my Shure E2c intraauricular earphones, the creme de la creme for under 100 euros, with noise-cancelling pads and a remarkable sound, and I've got those Philips ones that pass above my ears and behind the neck and with a reflective band wrapped around the neck thingy.
And these are the ones I was wearing until 5 minutes ago. They're uncomfortable, they don't mix well above and behind the ears with glasses. On my left ear. I've got no problem on my right ear, my glasses fit nicely in a groove behind the ear, and the headphones can be positioned easily on top.

Now that groove is totally artificial, man-made and 15 years old (hence the title).
It was no accident, it actually had been planned for the better part of the 10 earlier years.
I was born with a labioschisi (?)(une fente labiale in french, it sounds so much more civilised) and although it was mild and did not touch the palate. My first operation was performed when I was 6 months old, I think. Then I had a second one when I was 2 One of these, probably the second, was traumatic. I have no recollections, but I have had nightmares for years to come that involved hospitals and water with sugar. My mother told me she could only visit once a day in the afternoon, for a few hours. I was probably in hospital for a week, so I'm sure it was hell.
From then onwards, and until kids grow old enough to shut up, I was called names by "the others", probably a select few, but the number didn't make a difference. And what I had called the little mountain road with a parking lot on the middle grew with me. It didn't look that bad, I was actually a cute kid. With a scar and a nose that didn't look straight, but cute.

I had a third op on December 19th, 1990. My birthday was on December, 20th. Truly a fantastic gift. I ran between panic attacks and bursts of tears for days before we even checked in. Memories didn't resurface, but I suppose they weren't that deep. I managed to evade the anaesthesia for a long time before the mask was firmly pressed on my face and I drifted. My nose had slowly stopped growing and it needed some fresh material to restart. And the closest to the nose cartilage is... ear cartilage. So they made that little groove behind my right ear, sculpted that cartilage with laser and placed it on the tip of my nose. How many people can listen with their nose, huh?? Well, I almost can. Well, the staff was friendly, mom slept in a bed next to mine (was it a bed or a simple chair???) and I was offered one of my all time favourite gifts for my birthday. I couldn't eat anything solid of course, but mom still bought a couple of "tartes aux myrtilles" for the other kids in the service. So my cake turned out to be a pink and blue inflatable one with 10 candles on the top. Soooo sweet. I felt like s**t, but I can remember that one all too well, 15 years later. It got lost years later while we were moving from one house to another.
Well, my nose was better, I could use it to breathe, I could clean it (in all honesty, I still don't like doing it though, better sneeze than blow it clean but I'm never sick anyway) and it looked straighter. People of my size don't see anything usually, but kids look at me with questions in the eyes. There's no aggressivity behind their looks usually, just questions, I find it amusing and yes, sweet :p.

My surgeon from that time told me for my last check-up when I was 15 that I could have a last operation, purely for aesthetics when I reached my adult physiology. I haven't done it yet, but I might decide someday to have it done. I'll take the decision as an adult, knowing in what context I will do it, and what psychological impact it may have.

Well, in the end, I can still move the tip of my nose very slightly sideways and that groove behind my right ear reminds me everyday that I've got that little something different from everyone else :-)

Emergency situation - update 2

New interview 28th of March 9AM, close to the airport.
They're interested in Quality Management (blah) and Project Management (super blah)

Points: +10.

Emergency situation - update

Well, that was quick!

I'm going to Bordeaux on monday for a job interview that may send me to Hamburg or Bremen, Germany for almost a year.
I need to get my costume dry-cleaned, reserve a train and hopefully get some of the train costs reimbursed by the ANPE.

And I've scored points on the Scale. Now, let's get moving...

Haha, it also appears another firm is interested in my profile, except they won't contact me directly but ask me to register on their own site so they can "manage in the best possible way my profile". Recruiters talk for "my database wants you, but we don't". I guess I have no real choice, I'll feed the database.

Emergency situation

In 3 weeks, more or less, I'll meet at the ANPE for my second situation review, 3 months after the first one. I will be supposed to show that I have taken the necessary steps to find another job, sent letters, had interviews, responded to job offers...
On the impression I make and on the evidence of my work I can provide, the ANPE will decide if I am working hard enough that I am worth my unemployment indemnities.
And frankly, I am not. I've barely sent a few letters, received almost zero answers, went to zero interviews. And I've done nothing in more than a month now, due to computer crash and code learning. I'm actually making excuses here.
I hate looking for a job, it's one of the most humiliating experiences I've ever had, and a long lasting one at that.
First, I'm checking the APEC (Agence Pour l'Emploi des Cadres) site, the ANPE site, Monster.fr, the Airbus site and the EADS site for job offers. All job offers require either a massive experience, a list of specific capabilities I've never heard about or are in freaking project management, blah...
So when I've found a job offer I can reply to, I need to reply with a proper resume (easy) and a proper cover letter that will tell partial truths about what I do know and not about what I do not know or don't remember. I've never been any good at that, telling what people want to hear and not telling them what they don't want to hear.

So, I'm not sure I can hit enough points to impress the ANPE. That would mean I'd get downgraded to the Revenu Minimum d'Insertion, which won't even pay my rent. The masochistic me almost wants to reach that time when I'll have to do small jobs just to keep afloat, or not.

I wanted it....

I've lost my first auction today on ebay...
I had registered just for that item, a 1958 book from the Ecole du Personne Navigant d'Essais et de Reception, the french test pilots school, on flight mechanics and flight testing. The bible...
I used it a few years ago to program a flight simulator on Excel during an internship. My tutor had it and lent it to me so I could work out how the equations I needed. I almost hoped he would give it to me at the end of my placement, but it was a signed book by the test pilot from the cover photograph. No chance.
I've been looking for it every so often ever since.
And there it was, even though the picture only showed a diagram on rudder correction in case of engine failure on a twin. I knew it was it, it had the right title, the right look, the right date. And in the middle, somewhere around page 192, there should be the Equation, the one that links the attitude of the plane in space to its trajectory, G, speed, and turn radius in all possible orientations of the plane. That equation was the actual core of my simulation at that time. Everything else was petty details and tedious programming. I of course couldn't take my work with me (not when you're working with the military), and I was sure it would be given to us in the flight dynamics course we'd have the next year. Except we didn't see it.
That was (and still is) the motivation behind the quest.

So I created an account, logged on and auctioned. And I got it for a meager price, until 6 seconds before the end of the auction. Then some lowlife loser played the asshole and got it.

What's the conclusion? Be a lowlife loser yourself and don't play fair. You'll be the loser in the end.

breeding figures

*** WARNING GEEK TALK AHEAD ***
I'm very proud to announce that I've finally managed to breed proper figures. LOL

I've been looking from afar at genetic algorithms for quite some time now, and I've decided to make the jump and try it a few weeks ago. Then my computer broke, I found other stuff to do and I only came back to it again a week ago. And now it works :D.

The principle is quite simple, very similar to breeding animals or flowers to achieve the most beautiful/resistant/sweet one. Professional breeders do that by mating the best specimens they have and the next generation is better than the previous one, usually. Choose the best of the new, and you get the creme. Choose again and voila, la creme de la creme.

Well, in short, I'm doing the same with figures that represent objects. Let's say I want to have the cheapest and sturdiest bridge depending on its thickness, its width and the material.
To start, the computer will design 30 bridges using formulae I've programmed.
Then it will give them scores: low for expensive and weak, medium for expensive or weak, high for cheap and sturdy.
Second, it will code the 3 parameters (thickness, width and material) into digital chromosoms and mate these chromosoms to produce 10 new bridges. Some will be better than the first generation, some will be worse, it's more or less random.
Third, it gives scores to the new ones, and includes them in the pool of bridges. The 10 worst bridges are discarded, and a new generation can be created from the 30 remaining.
Repeat 10 times or more, and you have "the perfect bridge", strong and cheap.


It works for everything, the NASA has used a similar approach to design an antenna to be mounted on a satellite Look here, it's been simulated on race cars to make them faster, and I do remember that a bridge somewhere has been designed that way (with way more parameters of course).

Well, am just soo happy it works :D I'll need to try it one something "real" as I've only tested it on a simple math function at the moment :D.
And then I can play with it, I haven't tried to induce mutations yet and I also need to test how many specimens and how many generations are needed.

lousyyyyyyyyyy

Lousy week end ahead...
Noone I asked is free this week end in toulouse. Soooo am going to spend it inside most probably. And for once, I don't look forward to it too much. I may go to the movies tomorrow, but there's nothing I want to see at the moment. I won't go shopping, except to fill my fridge because there's way too many people out there to do anything.
And I won't go cycling because the weather is quite uncertain, it's currently raining.
There's one massive good piece of news though, but I can't talk about it just yet.
One thing I could do is work on my code. I'm still having problems with some road signs and all the legal stuff. Oh and lights too, that is so damn hard to get. I still haven't completely got the logic behind it, when can I use which, when do I have to use which, when is which forbidden...
And I need to collect my notes and sum them up for later.
And I could clean my room, theoretically. Well, I should but you know the deal...

There are some good news around from the ladies though, so everything is not lost. lol

I want a pave jambon chevre with three petits tigrés from the bakery in Versailles or a grilled veggies and goat cheese panini with a tomato soup from Bristol. I could do with 2 1/2 pounder chicken with fries soaked in vinegar too, from bristol also. Mom's special sandwich could be enjoyable too...
I guess I'll have to settle for a homemade (read bad) salad tomorrow... and a bowl of All-Bran Fibre Plus that tastes worse than I remembered right now. Or I'll digest my own stomach from the inside out.
I'm hungry and depressed. Great mix.

snapshot

I'm looping two CDs on my sound system at the moment.
The first one's the latest Enya album, Amarantine. I've known her for many years now, since The Celts and Shepherd Moons. Later on I discovered Memory of Trees and Watermark, although I haven't listened to these as much as to the two first.
A couple of months ago, I saw a poster for Amarantine. It was a bit of a shock to seen the new design, way more colourful, way more dramatic, and way more commercial. I didn't hurry to pick it up, afraid her music had also turned commercial. Then my iPod and my computer broke and my only way to listen to music was to listen to actual CDs on my PS2 coupled to my sound system. So I finally decided to buy it, and yes some tracks are slightly more mainstream than the albums I already knew. However I also believe that it's a welcome evolution to her style. It remains very limited and doesn't feel like a betrayal from my previous experiences.
I especially like track 8 -Someone said goodbye- at the moment, but it's so easy to listen to this album that I haven't picked up the individual other tracks yet. Gotta keep listening.

The other CD is one I "asked for" for Christmas. Remember I asked for a good saxophone CD? Well turns out my parents gave me Bossa Antigua from Paul Desmond. That's not what I expected at all, I was looking at something very jazzy. And well Bossa Nova isn't that bursting, is it? So well I was a bit disappointed again and left the CD on the pile while returning to goth and heavy metal. And then my iPod.. well you get the deal. So I put it in my trusty PS2 and listens to it a few times as I idle out on the couch.
My mom confessed dad chose it (that wasn't much news I guess) and he confessed he was in the kind of mood where soothing music is what's best for one's mind. That's just it, it's not a cd that will invade your living room or your mind or anything. Instead it will build a deep comfortable cushion under and around you. It shields me from the exterior world in a soft bubble of calm. If I close my eyes, I can hear the sound of the wind rustling in the sugarcanes and I can feel the heat from the sun shielded by palm trees. Hamoc included.

If your in that kind of mood I highly recommend those two albums.

Other news:
13 mistakes out of 40 questions on my first ever code lesson. Good start, now I need to consistenly reach 2 to 3 mistakes per lesson to have the exam. I'm giving myself one month and a half.
I've seen Lost Season 2 up to the current episode. I feel a bit uncomfortable with the way it's turning, but I remain hooked.
Anyone have a bottle of milk? I've run out, and I'm having withdrawal syndroms.

4:13 am

it's 4:13 AM, am going to bed when I finish this post.
I've already paid the driving school this afternoon, and am going to my first "lecon de code" tomorrow at 1PM. If I can I'll do all the lessons from 1PM to 8PM. Do the same on friday, work the book saturday and sunday and head back to the school on monday. 2 months of that treatment might be enough to get my "code" exam. Or it might not and I need more than 2 months. Sheeesh, that's harder to get than the freaking baccalaureat or even an engineering degree. I've never worked so much for a freaking exam in my entire life. And once I've got my code, I will be qualified to learn how to drive a car. So I'll take lessons to drive a car, just like I took lessons to learn english and conceive a mathematical simulation. And then I'll "passer mon permis" and hopefully pass it, and they'll let me run wild. And then (finally) I'll learn how to drive a car, for real. Not the academic way of driving a car, just like the english I was taught isn't spoken by anyone else than the english teachers and their students. Is it useful? Of course, but it doesn't prepare you much for the real world, does it?

Oh and yeah, it's a probatory paper, I can lose it for the smallest mistake. Right, and I must remain 20 kph below the speed limits on all open roads. For 2 years, or is that 3? Can't remember if they upgraded that as well.
I'll need to own a car for something like 5 more years to get my insurance bonus at the lowest rate.
By then, we'll be teleporting to work through the internet connection.

And that second-rate employement contract they're ramming down our throat, don't even get me started on that. I might write something about that one day.

Let's get old fast, it's less trouble and you don't feel like the useless, costly and plagued black sheep of society. France should kill every person who reach the age of 12, that's when troubles begin. Damn right.

driving license!!

It's decided, I'm trying to get my driving license, subrscription at the school tomorrow when I have shaved and when I have correct ID pictures.
If things happen in the correct timeframe, I should get the theory exam within 2 months (optimistic timeframe, ok) and start practicing right after that. 4 months should do from tomorrow to the final pink paper.

Now, for the important part, Lost...
Watched episode 19 a few minutes ago (that with the discovery of the Lockheed) and the history of Locke.
Sure is an interesting fellow, kinda creepy mystical "The Island tells us what to do" kinda fellow. ALthough right now he's in a tight situation that could be reversed since the window suddenly lightened up. He seems to have a deep connection with the island and has a freaking knowledge of the jungle. He really is the only one who found his place living there. Everyone knows it's gonna be a long time until they're saved (3rd season anyone?) and they adapted, but he's on a different scale. His story has more depth than that of anyone else, probably because of his relation ship with the jungle.
There isn't any character I don't like, even Sawyer is turning into a not-so-bad-guy. Oh well, Shannon has been a bitch since the beginning and remains the worse of the lot. Ethan notwithstanding. But it feels like he's not Alex in the end.
I like how the series is built around the personal history of each and how teams arose from the survivors to form efficient entities that work to a common goal.

Well, my favourite is still Claire no matter what :p too cute, pregnant, with an adorable accent (when she's not furious) and a bit lost in the middle of all that. Nah, the character "designers" did a great job :p

Ok, back to ep. 20

reborn laptop

Yes, the laptop is back, since thrusday afternoon actually.
Nice fright when I started it, as the screen didn't work. And when I rebooted and it worked, the CD drive wasn't recognised and the right speaker picked some electronic noise. I thought I had to send it back for repairs...
Fortunately it was just an unscrewed screw below the CD drive.

So I'm back wasting my time on the internet and watching animes, and NCIS, and Numb3rs, and Lost Season 1.

Feels good :D

dead laptop - update 2

UPS picks up the laptop at my place tomorrow morning, They bring the packaging. I just put the laptop in with all removable part removed, check the paperwork, sign at the bottom.
4 to 5 days later, they call me and we arrange a time to hand it back to me. So I'll be unavailable until at least wednesday next week.

Screen will be replaced, motherboard will be replaced, I'd hope they trade it for a new one but I wasn't provided the option. The only other component that may fail is the hard drive, which I can remove and replace fairly easily myself. Actually, I'm supposed to remove it before I give it UPS.

And my soundcard and my Firewire port will work again!!!! So cool :D

See you in a week :D

dead laptop - update

Contacted Dell Customer Support, nice guy, seemed to know what he was talking about (good scripting, Dell script-writer guy!!)
Replacement of screen should be the solution. As I had to perform additional tests with standalone screen, I went to see a couple of friends who I hadn't seen in a long time. Promise to meet again soon, possibly next week end.
No symptoms on exterior screen, the connection is probably the root-cause of all that.
I'll call Dell tomorrow morning to inform them and decide if I want a technician to come and replace the screen here or if I want to send the laptop to their workshop for a complete check up.
Foreseen unavailability is "none" in the first case and 6 days if it's sent back.

I will choose the workshop solution if possible, cuz they could replace the broken soundcard at the same time. I just need to make sure that I don't have to package the laptop. I got rid of the delivery box a long time ago.

All in all, I'm satisfied with their handling of the case, we'll see tomorrow how it goes.

my ________ is dying, take 2

After the iPod, RIP, the laptop...

It's 35 months old, anf the warranty is valid for 3 years. The backlight for the screen is messed up. No idea why. I can adjust the lighting between dim and super bright, I've always adjusted it to super bright.
And a week ago, it started to flicker between super bright and bright when I started it. 2 hours ago, it flickered again, except I hadn't started it, I had done that 7 hours earlier. And all of a sudden, the light went out. So I shut it off via the Power button, and restarted it. Made a couple of tests, restarted it blind a few times, checked my warranty paper and here it is.
I'm calling them tomorrow to see how I can have it repaired under warranty. I guess I'll have to sent it myself but I also guess I have no choice. Of course, it had to happen while I need it the most, right when I'm trying to look for a new job. And right when I don't have much money to spend.

Anyway, data backed up on an external drive, most important files burned on a CD. Let's hope it won't take too long to repair...

I'll update my blog as soon as I know what's the status on the warranty and the sending for repair. Just pray Ol' Dell doesn't suddenly lose another functionality...

Snow!!!

There's snow all over the place, and it keeps falling!!!!
I will have to go in town to take other pictures today.

The Salars of Uyuni, Bolivia

A long time ago, a certain someone told me of a photographers site: TrekEarth
I still go very often, specially when I have little to do.
I'd describe it best as a site with "pictures of the world", it's full of amazing photographs. Well, some photographers tend to rework their picts a lot using computers, which I don't particularly. It sometimes feels like cheating.
Even then, you can find real pearls while wandering.

And tonight, I found this pic, which led me to this gallery of the Uyuni in southern Bolivia (so says the site at least). I've never been interested in southern america (cuz that's where Bolivia is, right?) but that place? That's something different altogether. I'll probably forget everything about it except the "feeling" before long, but I wish I could visit it. I might look for places to see in the general area, trying to plan holidays over there. I've got a friend of a friend (who coincidentally is a super cute and freaking pig-headed girl, who guessed?) if she knows anything about it. She's doing field-work for a travel agency in southern america, so she might have been there already.
God, this place is so incredible...

Hey, certain someone :-) I'm sure you'd love to go too, right? And that photographer we know may well feel it's worth a trip too.

Follow up

My iPod is dead, gone, I'm planning an official burial in the kitchen garbage bin this afternoon, no digging though.

Now, I need a contingency plan fast.
Let's review the options:
Philips HDD6320
Only works on Win XP, I have enough of billy's crap on my computer, and I HATE WHEN YOU DON'T GIVE ME A CHOICE. Your behaviour is offensive, Mr. Philips. And yes, this means no.

Creative Zen Sleek
May do, but it doens't look as good as an iPod and it seems to hang to often

Neuros 442
No need for video or supersize-me-screen, a tad expensive

iRiver H320
not available in france, H10 only supports Win XP, you know the drill...

iPod 30 GB vid 5G white
Last man standing, even though:
it doesn't support any open standards, only mp3 and proprietary lossless AAC
it's overrated
it's not geek anymore
it doesn't work on linux all that well
there's no external power supply anymore
it scratches like hell
battery life is shorter than it used to be
it got videos and a massive colour screen
it lasted 2 1/2 years, but my bros' haven't lasted 1 year 1/2
...

Now, I just need the money... ... ...
I need a job, fast...

my iPod is dying

I've had it for longer than both my brothers, even though we bought it at the same time and I have been the roughest with it. I've actually crash-landed on it on a memorable friday night 14 months ago during a high speed skating session. It looks old and battered and used.
The hard drive was actually in pretty bad shape, I suspect clusters had been damaged during the fall and I could not listen to a few tracks; it would jump like a damaged CD. But it would work nonetheless. Until now...

Last saturday, it hung at the start of a song. No response to the clickwheel, no reaction when I plugged it, none either when I unplugged it, even the screen stopped being updated alltogether. Well, it all went back to normal when the batteries ran out and I plugged it. Until I tried listening to it in the train, unplugged. It died on me again, at the worst moment.
I'm trying to reinitialise it to see if it could help, but am quite sceptical it will last much longer.

So, I've started looking for a replacement. It needs:
at least 20 GB of harddrive space, possibly 30
Support for MP3 and OGG, if possible FLAC
Excellent sound quality
At least 8 hours of battery life
Easy navigation
Easy update process
Overall strength
Small form factor

It doesn't need:
video playback
picture galleries
fm radio
recording

And it's damn hard to find something cheap with these requirements
Best bet are:
Philips HDD6320 (no OGG)
Creative Zen Sleek (no OGG)
Neuros 442 (too big and no OGG yet)
iRiver H320 (super expensive)
iPod (no OGG)

this is tragic...